Loneliness in Elderly Migrants: Effects on African Grandmothers Abroad 

By Adebowale Bello. B.Tech Microbiology, Freelance Health Writer. Reviewed by A. Odutola, MBBS, PhD

Portrait of a black migrant grandmother with her grandson taking selfie with a digital tablet while sitting on a sofa at home. Image credit: Freepik

In many African families, especially in urban settings, the sight of a grandmother arriving from the village or another town to help raise the grandchildren is as common as the morning sun.

Today, that tradition has taken an international twist. With the rise in migration, especially among Africans in the Diaspora, many older women are relocating abroad to assist their children with caregiving.

While this act is rooted in love and duty, a recent scientific study has noted that it comes at a price; the risk of loneliness, especially among older adults who move abroad for caregiving or retirement.

About the Study

The study, conducted by researchers from the Netherlands, analysed responses from nearly 5,000 Dutch retirees living in 40 countries and compared them with over 1,300 retirees who remained in the Netherlands. Their focus was on understanding emotional and social loneliness among people who migrate after the age of 65, a group referred to as retirement migrants. 

Social loneliness involves the lack of a wider circle of friends and community, while emotional loneliness is the absence of close emotional bonds, such as with a partner or best friend.

The distinction is important because someone can be surrounded by people yet still feel emotionally empty, or they can feel alone in a crowd because they lack deeper social ties.

What the Study Found

Retirement migrants, including those who relocated with high hopes of a better quality of life or to support their children, were found to be more socially lonely than their peers who stayed in their home country. 

However, they were not necessarily more emotionally lonely, especially if they moved with a partner. What stood out most was that losing contact with old friends and children back home significantly increased emotional loneliness.

The study also highlighted that having a sense of belonging to the new country reduced feelings of loneliness but achieving this sense of belonging is easier said than done. 

What This Means for Elderly African Migrants

The findings may resonate deeply with African families, particularly women who migrate later in life to help their children abroad. While the sacrifices made by these women are honourable, it's important to understand the social and emotional toll migration can take on them.

For many African grandmothers, integration into a Western society can be slow and difficult, especially if they are not fluent in the local language or face subtle forms of exclusion.

African grandmothers who move to help raise their grandchildren face sudden cultural shifts, unfamiliar surroundings, language barriers and the loss of their traditional support systems. They may be physically present, yet socially and emotionally isolated.

Furthermore, African cultures value extended family networks and regular communal interactions and moving to a society that is more individualistic can be difficult. The expectation that one can simply start over and blend-in often overlooks the deep bonds and social rhythms these women leave behind.

What Can You Do?

If you're an African family considering bringing your elderly grandmother abroad, it's crucial to plan for their social wellbeing, not just their legal paperwork and accommodation.

Here are some practical steps to take:

• Encourage regular contact with friends and family back home. Video calls, voice notes and social media can help maintain old ties.

• Support their involvement in community or cultural groups. African churches, women’s meetings, or cultural associations can create a sense of home away from home.

• Pay attention to changes in mood or behaviour and get professional help early. Loneliness often hides behind quietness or withdrawal.

• Make space for them beyond caregiving. Remember that they have needs too: emotional, social and spiritual.

While building new friendships, participating in community events, or joining local faith groups may help migrant African grandmothers, be mindful that the effort required may still feel overwhelming for someone in their 60s or 70s.

Wrap Up

Migration, even in old age, is often seen as an opportunity. But for the African grandmother who relocates abroad to support her children, it can come with silent battles. The findings of this study are a reminder that love and duty should not overshadow social and  emotional wellbeing.

Supporting our grandmothers in new environments goes beyond shelter and gratitude. It includes helping them build new social circles, ensuring they stay connected to their roots and most importantly, recognising that even paradise can feel lonely without community.

Source: American Psychological Association news release

Related: Why mental health matters

Published: May 2, 2025

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